Ten practical lessons from Epictetus, the formerly enslaved Stoic teacher, drawn from the Enchiridion and Discourses with references, and how to apply them to work, relationships and everyday frustrations.
Epictetus was born around AD 50 in Hierapolis, in what is now Turkey, and spent his early life enslaved in Rome. After gaining his freedom, he taught philosophy in Rome until the emperor Domitian banished philosophers from the city, then set up a school in Nicopolis in north-west Greece. He wrote nothing himself. His student Arrian recorded his teaching in the Discourses and a short summary, the Enchiridion or Handbook.
His teaching is blunt and practical. Here are ten lessons, with references so you can read them in context.
1. Sort things into what's up to you and what isn't
The Enchiridion opens with this idea (section 1). Your judgements, choices and actions are up to you; your body, property, reputation and other people's behaviour are not, at least not fully. Put your effort where you have control.
Try it: before a job interview, focus on preparing well and answering honestly, not on the decision, which isn't yours to make.
2. It's your judgement that upsets you
"Men are disturbed not by the things which happen, but by the opinions about the things." (Enchiridion 5) When you feel angry or anxious, look for the judgement underneath, such as "this is unfair" or "this is a disaster", and question it.
3. Want things to happen as they do
Don't demand that events go your way; wish for them to happen as they actually happen, and you'll be at peace (Enchiridion 8). This isn't giving up: it's accepting reality as the starting point for action.
4. Nothing is truly yours to lose
"Never say about anything, 'I have lost it,' but 'I have returned it.'" (Enchiridion 11) Possessions, roles, even people are, in a sense, on loan. Seeing them this way helps you appreciate them and cope better with loss.
5. Everything has two handles
Epictetus says every situation can be carried by one handle or another (Enchiridion 43). If your brother wrongs you, don't pick it up by "he wronged me", which is unbearable, but by "he is my brother", which you can carry. Choose the framing that lets you act well.
6. Remember your roles
Your duties come from your relationships: as a child, parent, colleague, citizen (Enchiridion 30). Ask what someone in your role should do, regardless of how others behave.
7. Decide who you want to be, then act
"First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do." (Discourses 3.23) Clear values make daily choices simpler.
8. Don't just talk philosophy, live it
Epictetus warns against showing off your learning (Enchiridion 46). Sheep don't bring their grass to the shepherd to show how much they've eaten; they digest it and produce wool. Show your philosophy in how you act.
9. Progress means being willing to look foolish
If you want to improve, be content to seem foolish or uninformed about outside things (Enchiridion 13). Caring too much about how you appear holds you back.
10. Train like an athlete
Epictetus compares philosophy to athletic training: it takes daily practice, small steps and accepting setbacks (Discourses, throughout). Start with small irritations, such as a delayed train or a rude email, before tackling big ones.
Reading Epictetus yourself
The Enchiridion takes under an hour to read. Older translations by George Long and Elizabeth Carter are free online. Quotations above follow common translations, and wording varies.
Sources and further reading
- Project Gutenberg: The Enchiridion
- Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy: Epictetus
- Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy: Epictetus
Facts checked on 20 October 2026. Spotted an error? Tell us and we will correct it.
Frequently asked questions
What should you know about 1. Sort things into what's up to you and what isn't?
The Enchiridion opens with this idea (section 1). Your judgements, choices and actions are up to you; your body, property, reputation and other people's behaviour are not, at least not fully.
What should you know about 2. It's your judgement that upsets you?
"Men are disturbed not by the things which happen, but by the opinions about the things." ( Enchiridion 5) When you feel angry or anxious, look for the judgement underneath, such as "this is unfair" or "this is a disaster", and question it.
What should you know about 3. Want things to happen as they do?
Don't demand that events go your way; wish for them to happen as they actually happen, and you'll be at peace ( Enchiridion 8). This isn't giving up: it's accepting reality as the starting point for action.
What should you know about 4. Nothing is truly yours to lose?
"Never say about anything, 'I have lost it,' but 'I have returned it.'" ( Enchiridion 11) Possessions, roles, even people are, in a sense, on loan. Seeing them this way helps you appreciate them and cope better with loss.
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Chris is a freelance writer and editor covering a wide range of topics with a focus on accuracy and depth.
Last updated: 2026-04-25 · Fact-checked by editorial team